Tag Archives: respect

I Think It Is Time

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Sometimes I wonder about the state of this world, of the lives people are leading in the search of temporary happiness and the general direction we are heading in. I wonder if the advance of technology was really the best thing our brilliant minds could come up with.

Let’s take a general look at the road down which we are all travelling towards: superficial lives based on money and materialistic things, selfish natures and lack of self-respect. What happened to us?

There are no words to describe the situation of the world today. If it is not war, its natural disaster, and if it is neither of those, it is corruption. There is so much negativity going around. Where is it going to stop? Are we really going to turn a blind eye towards all of this?

Life is so much easier for us, yet we are so busy trying to be better than our neighbor, get ahead of ourselves that we finally lose our sense of self and why we are doing this. Why are we doing this? There is no peace to be found down that path. Well, not to my knowledge anyways.

We are so busy being busy that we don’t have time to be us so much so that we don’t even know who we are except to be the robots we are made to be, following dreams of others. How many of us can say that’s true?

When did things get this mad? At what point did technology make us obese? At what point did striving to be the best lead to personality disorders? At what point did doing the best for your family mean that they got the best education but went without food? At what point did it become ok to mistreat animals for human gain? Where did we go wrong?

People, we have lost ourselves. Everything that is happening now, the wars, the natural disasters, the corruption, the lack of food, the height of ignorance, the spread of stupidity is all because of us. Think about it.

We no longer fight for important things, and those who do can’t be heard loud enough or are just shouting in the dark. We are obsessed with materialistic thoughts spread around by ignorant people and we are following them in their parade towards a cold, heartless world.

Modesty was thrown out the window with our clothes. Respect was strangled with lines of filth. Dignity suffocated from a lack of morals. Religion was corrupted and flung to a side. Can anything be trusted anymore? I don’t know. I’m beginning to doubt myself. I’m beginning to doubt everything around me.

I know we’d like to convince ourselves that we are lucky than our ancestors, but is that really true? Are we lucky because we are too busy to show our loved ones they are loved? Are we lucky because we hide our emotions in order to survive? Are we lucky because we lost all our humanity, morality and dignity to insanity?

Because I don’t think that’s anything great. In fact, it’s downright depressing. We are never truly happy, we don’t smile enough, our laughter doesn’t ring and our heart is never content.

No matter what religion you practice, the base of each is to love yourself and respect your neighbor, don’t give in to greed, lust or power. Always do the right thing, and never lie. There is a reason for all of this. The biggest of all is to leave us with a sane conscious.

Don’t give in even if it seems to be the easier choice. Say no. Love your parents and siblings. Keep close family relations. Always spread joy. Listen to both sides of the story. Encourage good things. Stay away from people who bring out the worst in you. Forgive.

This madness has gone on long enough. We need to change this. Our predecessors want the best for us, they want an easier life for us. But remember, the easier life may not necessarily be the happiest. They always had time to be with their family. They had their priorities straight. We need to figure ours out.

There was always love. There was no pawning of children to maids or neglect of elderly parents at nursing homes. There was no swearing when things didn’t go our way. There was no disrespect of others. There was no self-obsession and extreme selfishness.

Don’t get caught up in this path of self-destruction. Don’t fall for this commercialized idealistic life. Follow your heart now before it gets corrupted, find the truth and distinguish it from the zillions of falsehoods out there. Go for the clear conscious.

Look around you. Look at your life. A good hard look. Is this what you thought your life would be like? Have clear goals. Work towards them. Remember what goes around, comes around and sometimes karma can be a b!tch 😉

Wish you all the best. My prayers are with you.

I do, do I?

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There comes a phase in everyone’s life where they are eager to get married, and start a life and family of their own. My mother seems to have hit that phase for me, not that I don’t understand where she’s coming from. Or you are in that phase in your life where you are the only bachelor(ette) at your friends’ weddings. But in all seriousness how am I supposed to marry someone, any random person from somewhere?

Yes, of course I should and you should marry the one you love. But what if that person you love now isn’t “good enough” for you? Or if the person you love now doesn’t fit the social/religious/ethnic/economic background as you? Or if the person you love isn’t going to be the same person after let’s say 10 years? 20 years? 50 years?!

How do we know what’s love? Because I definitely don’t know what it is. How can you love someone and hurt them at the same time? They say love conquers all. Does it? Love is a questionable matter in a relationship. Psychology says that you look for attractiveness in a friend but not in a lover – that struck me as weird. I personally wouldn’t date someone I wasn’t attracted to, let alone marry.

So, is love an important ingredient in marriage? I don’t know. Some love marriages work out great and some arranged marriages work out great. Some people get the concept of arrange marriage and forced marriage mixed up, so let me set that straight before I continue, forced is without your consent and arranged is with.

In a love marriage, you already know and love the person you are willing to marry and spend the rest of your lives trying to keep up that love and faith you once had in each other. On the other hand, in an arranged marriage you spend the rest of your lives together learning to love each other and work around each compliment and fault. In my opinion love isn’t the bond that holds all.

Then what is? I feel that it’s respect and trust. Love will blossom and wilt, just like a flower in the changing seasons. But if there is mutual respect of each other, of equality, of religion, of lifestyle, of ethnicity and trust that that person will always be there to catch you when you fall, be your strength in the storm and the light in your moment of darkness, there is nothing left for you to wonder about, just live.

Are you ready to take this leap of faith? Will you ever be? I hope I will be some day. But I know that right now, I am not, and I don’t really know when I will be. I have a plan. School… University… Work… (plus money in the bank to support myself, if necessary). This seems to be the general rule. Do what you got to do before you settle down. What if you are running out of time?

Mom says I should find someone now, so that when it’s my time to get married, I won’t be desperate. But I don’t want to find anyone now. I have so many personal insecurities about this whole aspect of life that I need to overcome before I even think that way, but how am I going to tell her that?! She keeps telling me that it’s fine. It’s not. How do you get married if you don’t even believe in it?

Is your life the perfect way to find someone? Are you living the life you want to live when you settle down or are you just trying out new things until you are ready to take that step? Some people know exactly what they want out of life; I admire them. I wish I knew what I wanted, well I do in a general sense of it all, but that’s not always enough.

In a way, marriage is the rest of your life. It’s a huge decision that you can’t take back. Now there’s divorce, separation and all those dramatic things, then you ask yourself, what happened to those vows? Is it really that bad that we can’t work it out? Is this entire institution a farce? It’s time to get serious. It’s ridiculous to get into it expecting to run if things go bad instead of working on it.

A good marriage is not always the easiest. It is good because both the individuals work on it, keeping the romance alive, keeping the trust and the faith and most importantly the companionship. The fire in a marriage or any relationship for that matter will die if there is nothing to keep it burning. But that in my opinion isn’t the most crucial thing if you don’t have friendship or understanding.

One of my greatest quirks is that I hate weddings. Everyone around me becomes so joyous at the news of someone in their family getting married; a sibling, a friend, a cousin. I can’t even begin to imagine why?! For me, especially if it’s someone I’m close to, it’s like I’m losing that person from my life and whatever distance there was between us is just going to get wider.

Once someone is married, they are so busy being married, living their lives together, changing to adapt one another that they don’t have time for you anymore. So whatever little girl on girl time or guy on guy time you one had just flew out the window as soon as the deed was signed. I despise that. I’m not so good on change – and this really hits me like a rock.

Not to continue being so pessimistic, it really is wonderful if the people you cherish in your life find their “soul” mates. That they know what they want and they got it. The happiness radiating on their wedding day, their eyes filled with hope of new beginnings without bitter endings, a rock in the storm, future memories of joy. I just hope that I will be all that one day. But for now, I’m just going to be me.

A Little Respect

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In which direction is this world heading? Far from the good, closing in on the worst. How long are we going to keep quiet about this? How long are we going to close our eyes and ears to it? We are moving past ourselves, to become people who we shouldn’t, and we don’t even see it coming.

The young talk back to the old. Those younger being bullied mercilessly. The students argue with the teachers. Boys are nasty to girls, and the girls equally rude to the boys. War for land. War for religion. War for greed. Indeed, where is this world headed? When did the respect, the tolerance, the patience stop getting passed down generations?

Respect is never given, it is earned; through trust, reliability, and guidance, not through treats, violence, or riches. But we demand it, we scream for it; for what use? There is discrimination and judgment in everyone’s eyes, a reason to despise, a reason to find fault, a reason to feel superior.

It is easy to think that our elders come from another generation, that they don’t understand where we are coming from. What we don’t think about is how we have changed with technology, and then begin to feel that we have become superior to them because of that, but in fact, technology or not, human life still passes through the same phases. Through experience, our elders know better.

Just because teachers are paid to teach us, we think that we have control over them. But we don’t. They deserve respect, they have taken it upon themselves to educate us, to allow us to achieve our potential. They guide us from their hearts. It is always important that education will always take us places. That the pen is mightier than the sword.

There has to be mutual respect between the masses. You can’t expect people to respect you if you don’t respect them. It must exist between genders. It shouldn’t be taken for granted that all girls think too high of themselves and all boys have ego’s high enough to go beyond the sky. These characteristics are all due to discrimination. They are our self-preservation mechanisms.

It should be there among the multi-religious, multi-ethnic communities. There isn’t a single place on earth where you’d find only a single race or a single religion. Everything is mixed. And we must learn to live with it. We can’t point fingers at groups if only a percent of them are corrupt. That too exists in every community, and it just takes another point of a finger to show that.

I know there have been times where you have been told to discriminate by elders due to their bad experiences. But open your mind and think again, if we can change from our elders, they can also mend their bad history and choose to go on the correct path. People need your support and encouragement, not fingers.

Learn to live in peace. Learn to respect each other. Learn to not point fingers. Learn to be good. Stop this war that’s going on within our lands and in our hearts. Respect yourself first. Show it in the way you walk, the way you talk, the way you dress and the way you react. Bring on the kindness. Have a heart. Send out a little bit of respect, you’ll get it back in plenty.

Respect your elders, those younger to you, those that guide you academically, spiritually, and through your extra-curriculars. Respect your school, respect the property around you, respect people, poor or rich. Don’t discriminate. Put yourself in that position before you point fingers or say something harsh.

Respect is earned not demanded. Show that you are worthy of it.