Tag Archives: broken

My December

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Now that you’re gone
my soul has lost its youthfulness
and my heart is tired.
But my eyes that search anxiously
for yours,
have come to find you in my dreams.
Now the love that they exude can
be set free;
while I sleep in tormented reverie.
Because the December that was
meant to be ours,
wasn’t really meant to be.

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That Girl

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I will always be that girl
standing in front of him
asking him to love her
beyond his brokenness.

I will always be that girl
standing beside him
with his fingers entwined in mine
for support in his confusion.

I will always be that girl
standing behind him
pushing him forward
through his insecurities.

I Am Whole

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When you leave,
my world might just not
make as much sense.
Though I will be
a sea of broken pieces
floating in the dark,

I am whole,
I never needed you
To complete me.

Why I wrote this:
Sometimes it feels like you are made up of pieces of place, things, moments, or people. You aren’t. You are whole. Time moves on and they go from present to past, and your future becomes your now. Don’t fret. Those pieces change shape, but always fit.

Cancer

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My eyes are tired holding onto those unshed tears.
My life in shambles since hope left after all these years.
My heart is broken and heavy but it’s void of fears.

I’m no longer chained, I’ve gotten my answer.
Now it’s just me, I’ve started walking away from the cancer.

 

Why I wrote this:
He said we were only friends and then he left for home. I cried, but I’ve started walking.

More poems on instagram @khroniklesofk –> link on the right column.

Shades of Perfect

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I thought you were my support.
That I could fall apart in your arms.
Until I was ready to piece myself together.
But you weren’t, and all I was, was broken.

I thought you were my knight.
Yet you had no armor nor a horse.
You were perfect, then you weren’t.
My flaws were apparent and yours too.

I thought you always had the words.
Those right words to soothe my restless heart.
A rush of fire to my dwindling hope.
How wrong I was to believe so.

But I learnt, I couldn’t expect you to be perfect.
Just to understand my imperfections.
You are human, just as much as me.
We err.

To myself. To my creator.
I am perfect.
That is my peace.
My support.

He has the words to forever guide me.
Like He guides you.
I don’t need a knight when I have a King.
He is everything I always needed, I just didn’t see it then.

Flicker

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It’s easy to get lost,
in this world of technology,
where human interaction
is weakened day by day.

It’s easy to get lost,
in the bigger picture,
mostly you can’t see it
consumed in drama.

It’s easy to get lost,
in your whirlwind emotions,
hormones on a roller coaster
having a good time.

But you find your way back,
you make that connection,
you see the bigger picture,
you get off the ride.

It all makes sense now,
We are the same,
but there is mistrust and
broken understanding.

It won’t change today,
like it never has.
And that in itself
is enough to say goodbye.

Losing Your Pieces

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Some times in life you need to start afresh. You need to close that chapter in your life and never look back – just forward. And the rush of emotions that come along with it is mind boggling; the good and bad, the happy and sad.

So, it looks like I’ll be living alone again. That’s not the part that bothers me so much, but I really hate living close to the people I have to see every day in class. There’s a total lack of privacy, politics everywhere, and no personal space. Isolation seems like a better choice, if one can afford it.

But I’m going to make the most of it. I have another 2 years to go, and then I’m done. I’m out! I’ve had some good times, made some great friends, lost some too and made a real person out of myself, I think.

However, it’s sad times when friends that used to be so close, drift apart or can’t compromise over small, insignificant things. As much as I try to let go, a part of me still wants to be friends, even after the anger and the annoyance.

So, how do friends drift apart? Can we ever get them back? Maybe those lines about friends coming and going, leaving footprints in our lives is all friends are for. When we grow and change, become different people, the people close to us might have to change with us. After all, friends are the family we choose for ourselves.

How about ex’s? Is all the love really gone once we are over? And is friendship out of the question?

As much as I would like to say that I hate all my ex’s, that would be a lie. Not that I love all of them, a few are still amazing friends of mine. Well one is. Not to give you any ideas, but I really think it’s about the level of maturity and honesty that both have and the total lack of those feelings.

Yet, it’s still depressing when someone who was once close to you, who shared secrets with you, who shared dreams with you; walks out and leaves you alone, without that warmth that used to be special between the two of you.

Along the passing years those fond days will go deeper into your heart, lost in the sea of memories that may surface from time to time, maybe on days when you are telling stories to your children or grandchildren or when you are revisiting the past over a cup of tea.

I miss my old friends from long ago. I wonder sometimes if we would still be friends now if distance and boys hadn’t come in between us. Those were the good ‘ol days. Now they are all the rage. And those from the future, we are yet to find out.

Living in the past is a waste of time. We will win some, and we will lose some. We just have to take what we have and make the best out of it. And hope that the hollow feeling will eventually fade in time when you replace them with someone else.

I would say friendship and love are like energy – they can neither be created nor destroyed but moved from one form to another – from one person to another. Replaced by a self-created piece of a jigsaw that you lost through the years of long distance and bad choices, a piece that will always make the puzzle complete, but is never truly the same as the original.